Your Circle is Either Building You Up or Breaking You Down
Your Friends Are Killing Your Dreams (And You're Letting Them)
You know that feeling when you leave someone's place and you're just... exhausted? Not the good kind of tired from having an awesome time, but that deep, mental drainage that makes you want to go home and recover?
Yeah, we've all been there. And there's a reason for that – I call these people energy vampires.
Let me break it down for you. These energy vampires come in all shapes and sizes. You've got your drama queens who can't go a day without some earth-shattering crisis. There's the chronic complainers who could find something wrong with a free vacation. And don't forget the negative nancies who think everything sucks and nothing will ever work out.
Being around them is like trying to run a marathon with weights strapped to your ankles – it just drags you down.
The Flip Side
Think about that friend who's always up to something interesting. Maybe they're learning to code while training for a half marathon. Or they're starting a side hustle while holding down their day job. Just grabbing coffee with them leaves you thinking, "Damn, I should get my act together!"
That's not a coincidence – their drive is contagious.
These high-energy people are like personal trainers for your motivation. When you see them crushing their goals, staying positive (but real) about challenges, and constantly pushing forward, it lights a fire under your ass.
You can't help but level up your own game.
The Power of Choice
Here's the thing about choosing your circle – it's actually pretty simple.
We all have the power to decide who we spend our time with. It's like being the bouncer at the club of your life. You get to choose who makes it past the velvet rope.
Sounds harsh? Maybe. But your time and energy are too valuable to waste on people who drain you.
And yeah, I'm talking about family too.
Just because someone shares your DNA doesn't mean they get a free pass to vampire away your energy. Sometimes you've got to create some distance – even from family – if they're constantly pulling you into their tornado of negativity.
Look for people who match or even surpass your passion for life.
People who get shit done. People who have goals and actually chase them instead of just talking about them.
These are your people. They're the ones who'll push you to be better without even trying.
So how do you actually make this happen? Let me break it down into real, actionable steps you can take.
Spotting the Right People
Look for those who actually do stuff instead of just talking about it. You know the type – they don't just say "I should start working out," they're already at the gym three times a week.
They're not just dreaming about starting a business, they're staying up late working on their business plan.
These are your people.
The Art of the Fade-Out
Here's the tricky part – cutting ties with energy vampires without creating a whole new drama.
You don't have to make some big announcement or have an awkward "it's not you, it's me" conversation. Just start being "busy" more often. Take longer to respond to those draining texts. When they call to dump their latest crisis on you, keep it short: "Hey, sorry to hear that, but I've got to run."
Eventually, they'll get the message.
Attracting Your Success Squad
Now, what about attracting more of those high-energy people? Simple – become one of them.
Start working on your own goals. Join groups or classes related to your interests. Hit up networking events in your field. High-achievers tend to hang out in places where stuff is actually happening.
Be the Friend You Want to Have
Be the kind of friend you want to have. Share opportunities instead of complaints.
Celebrate other people's wins instead of being jealous. Support their goals instead of pointing out why they might fail. Before you know it, you'll be attracting the kind of people who do the same.
Your Circle, Your Future
The people around you are either pushing you forward or holding you back.
There's no middle ground.
Every hour you spend with energy vampires is an hour you could've spent with someone who makes you better.
Think about where you want to be a year from now. Five years from now.
Now think about whether your current circle is going to help get you there. If you're looking around and seeing more anchors than engines, it's time to make some moves.
Remember, this isn't about being cold or cutting people off dramatically. It's about being smart with your energy and time – probably the two most valuable things you've got.
It's about understanding that "I've known them forever" isn't a good enough reason to let someone keep dragging you down.
When you start hanging out with people who are crushing their goals, suddenly your big dreams don't seem so crazy anymore. When you're surrounded by people who take action instead of making excuses, you start doing the same.
Time to make some choices. Your future self is banking on you making the right ones.
Quote of the Day:
"The key is to keep company only with people who uplift you, whose presence calls forth your best." - Epictetus
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